swim. love. travel.

my life daily

let’s watch the world go round

it’s always winter, but never christmas.
it seems this curse just can’t be lifted.

He looked at her, wishing he could do something.

He had just met her. They had only known each other for a few months – 4 months, to be specific, he thought to himself. He couldn’t help but feel this way about her. She was one of the most amazing people he had ever met. Yes, he knew he had only just met her. She was nice, kind, funny, and smart.

‘I know that sounds generic,’ he thought. But she was so much more than that. She was real. Not as in a real person – of course she was a real person. What’s the word for it? She was genuine. The kind of person everyone wanted to be friends with. The kind of person everyone just loved. The kind of person who was caring, kind-hearted, and most importantly – selfless. Her heart was as pure as glacier water, just…warm…glacier water. She never said anything bad about anyone before, ever – that he knew of, of couse.

But she was crying. He wanted to know why. He knew it had something to do with her boyfriend. He was never the right one for her. How can she not realize?

‘I’m the one for you, he thought. ‘You were always supposed to be with me.’

‘Why would he do this to me? Accusing me of lying? He called me a liar, Sidney!’ she said through streaming tears and red, puffy eyes. Her nose was red and runny, her hands were full of wet, crumpled tissues, her skin was pale and white.

He wanted to scream out,‘You’re beautiful! Don’t listen to him. He’s a jerk for making you cry – for calling you a liar. He doesn’t realize what he has.’ But he bit his tongue.

He couldn’t say it. Why was this so hard for him? Maybe it’s because he was just a friend. Who knew that word could hurt so much?

A part of him was always waiting for Beth and Jake to break up. He thought maybe then it would be his chance to swoop in and steal her heart. Seeing the pain that was on her face – her deep love for this Jake guy – he was having second thoughts. He had fantasized the entire thing. How he would take her out into the city at night and ask her out over a candlelight dinner at the Fat Belgian. How her eyes would shine and her face would glow at his request. How she would finally realize her undying love for him and take him in her arms.

Sometimes he felt like he was watching a movie. He felt as if he was seeing life from the outside looking in. He felt as if he was intruding into Beth’s life and he felt as if he didn’t belong. As if he was all alone watching the world go round without him. He wanted so desperately to take her in his arms and whisper, ‘Come with me. Let’s escape our lives. Let’s run away together and watch the world go round without us.’

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