swim. love. travel.

my life daily

frustrations

Sometimes, I really despise my imagination. I despise my imagination for giving me such a false sense of what reality is really like. It gives me false hope. I come up with things that will probably never happen in real life…but that doesn’t stop me from continuing to dream of such things. I can’t help it. It’s what I want my life to really be like. Too bad it’s not.

I have friends who’ve said to me as they go on about their life stories, “I’m finally at a place where reality is better than fantasy.” I’m still at a place where fantasy is better than reality. Is there something wrong with me?

Then I start to make up excuses. Perhaps my imagination is just more inventive and more wild than those of my friends. I’d then proceed to scold that thought because I’d be giving myself too much credit.

It seems to be true though. If anyone else could enter my imagination, I’d turn my head in shame because what they’d see would be pretty embarrassing. It’s so far from what my life is really like. Some days, I’d be a reality star in the hit show The Fly Life on MTV about a group of lifeguards at the pool. Naturally, I came up with this idea because I’m a swimmer. I’d make up my swimming abilities though. In that world, I’d be a part of the lifesaving team representing my town in lifesaving competitions (I actually don’t participate in lifesaving competitions at all). My strokes would be freestyle and butterfly (I don’t even know how to swim the butterfly), and although I wouldn’t be the strongest swimmer, I’d be the fastest swimmer…even out of all the male lifeguards. Too bad I’m actually not the fastest swimmer out of all the lifeguards at the pool I work at. I’d be dating my fellow co-workers (based on real crushes actually) but I wouldn’t cause any drama.

Some other days I’d be an Olympic champion in skiing and snowboarding – sometimes in swimming when the Summer Olympics come around. Other days, I’d be a star on the Broadway show “Les Miserables” or “Rent.” My alter ego would go by the name of Beth Richard (I took the last name from my past crush who I don’t have a crush on anymore but his last name was just so nice). Beth is half French and half English. In fact, Beth is distantly related to the English royal family so she is of royal blood…but not too distantly related because, of course, she was betrothed to Prince William at birth. Other times, Beth is a star on the show Prison Break and has been linked to Jake Gyllenhaal and James Franco.

I know. I have an imagination of a 12-year-old…but not just any 12-year-old…a lame, pathetic 12-year-old. These stories are only my imagination at its extreme. I do relate to my life remotely in some of my imaginings.

I do have a life, I promise.

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